July 19, 2006
Dear porcelain throne:
I apologize profusely in advance to HHboy for talking to the world about his "monkey tail business." Good gawd what is this kid eating.(must have been those 5 apple pies) Today we had to bee line out of the pool because he had to *go*. I take his potty Q seriously. I shall not be the one sending the kids home packing because my kid laid a chocolate egg.
We are in the stall and I'm about to puke. For the love of god, please hand me a gas mask. I still have to wipe his ass. Then of course he wants to point and show me, that it's "a big one, mommy" Lovely dear. You should be so proud. Maybe you can share these things with your father. Men seem to share the same love for their trophy snakes.
We retreat back to the pool. I am belly rubbing around in the piss-pool on my arms acting like a crab. Because you know that will get me phone numbers. My ass is also seemingly accentuated by the 1 foot of water.
Somehow I end up with like 5 kids on my back. Which is all fine. But hey moms, Stop talking and take your kids. This ain't mass transit.
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